The Lesser of Two Evils

Alright, I've got at least one thing I know I want to hit on this time around, so let's do that, and I'll see if I come up with anything else in the meantime.

A couple days ago, the French parliament issued a statement in which it collectively supported the country's ban on women wearing a burqa in public. The official position is that the burqa runs counter to national values, including equality of the sexes (the burqa, in case you're not aware, represents subservience of women to men in the Islamic faith, among other things). I latched onto this issue due to its controversial nature, but was surprised to find that, unlike nearly everything else, I didn't have a strong feeling about it one way or another. That is to say, I have sympathies to both sides of the issue.

Clearly, I am no defender of religion. I have no personal use for it, and I consider organized religion in any form to be at best a crutch and at worst a tool to control people. Even at that, however, I believe in personal freedom. People ought to be allowed to do whatever they like, with the provision that their actions cause no undue harm to anybody else. Of course, that's exactly why the situation is a hairy one. If France wishes itself to be a paragon of equality, and places great value on this virtue, then it certainly has every right to invoke laws which help to ensure that this will be the case. If the French government believes that the burqa and all that it represents is destructive to the equality which it aspires to, then it is right to place a ban on its public appearances. There are no restrictions on its private use, which is good, because if there were, I would have some very strong feelings against such a law.

What this essentially comes down to is, does a Muslim woman wearing a burqa in public cause any harm to anybody else? Well, you wouldn't think so, but some people do have an incredible propensity to be offended by pretty much anything that doesn't align perfectly with their own worldview. Personally, I think that such people are being overly sensitive and, quite probably, are attempting to force their own beliefs onto others, which is something that I have no use or tolerance for. Having your own opinion is great, but you have to accept that not everyone will, or should, agree with it. In the course of writing this piece, I have found myself gradually leaning toward disagreeing with the burqa ban. I can see the argument in favor of the ban, but ultimately, I don't think that wearing a burqa is hurting anyone, even if I don't personally agree with what it represents.

On a brief, unrelated note, prominent historian Howard Zinn died this week. He was, I thought, enormously important and influential. Some might have called him a revisionist, but that isn't strictly true. More accurately, you could say that he focused his works on some of the more hidden aspects of history, parts that aren't covered in your typical history texts due to their sometimes unsavory nature. Zinn often revealed the darker sides of our revered American heroes, but he was not an iconoclast just for the joy of it. He realized the importance of the truth and of an honest and more objective view of historical events, and that is a philosophy that I can really get behind. He will be sorely missed.

Cashing In

Oh, I'm going straight to the newsreels today, because I saw a couple things there that pissed me off, and it's pretty early for me to be that pissed off, so here goes.

I know that I ask this frequently (and rhetorically), but why does everything in this country have to make money? This time, I bring it up because the Supreme Court ruled to do away with corporate spending limits on federal election campaigns. Second question: so, um, yeah, how does this in any way make anything better in this country? Pretty simply, what this means is that big corporations can throw all the money they want at the candidates they like, which almost universally means Republicans, who are notoriously pro-big business. The problem with that should be obvious, but hey, let's state the obvious. If Wal-Mart throws millions of dollars at a candidate for office, and that candidate is elected (probably will be, since he or she will have much more campaign funds than his or her opponent), then that person will be compelled to act in ways favorable to Wal-Mart, rather than on behalf of the people who actually elected him or her. This is exactly why politicians seem almost always not to act in the interests of the American public; it's because they're not. And now the Supreme Court decides that, hey, that's not such a bad thing!

And by the way, in case you hadn't figured it out yet, big business is bad for America. Big business eliminates competition, even moreso since our anti-trust laws seem to be falling by the wayside. Without competition, prices go up, cost of living goes up. However, since big businesses are running everything, and they don't care about the average person working near the lower rungs of their company, perhaps running the registers or stocking the shelves in their stores, then those folks aren't earning a decent wage, and they can't afford it when the cost of living goes up. But that doesn't matter to your Wal-Mart executives and the like, as long as they get their fourteen cars and nine homes and monthly vacations in Paris. We expect that sort of behavior from executives, but when our politicians start behaving in that way, then nothing will be done to rectify those wrongs. In other words, we are now starting down a slippery slope towards the eventual demise of capitalism. So, hey, it's not all bad!

On a more minor note, the new film "Creation", starring the always-excellent Paul Bettany as Charles Darwin, was slow to find a company willing to distribute it in the United States, because Darwin's theory of evolution is still considered to be a hot potato issue in the U.S. Really? Is this country still that backwards that there's still controversy over evolution? Oh, right. It is. Still, when's the last time we ever let controversy stop us from making money in this country? Didn't distributors jump all over "The DaVinci Code" (also featuring Paul Bettany, incidentally) for the very reason that controversy sells? This crazy country.

Break Your Heart

I was just out driving, and I passed the Firefighters Memorial Building, or whatever that thing is down the street on 131. The marquee in front of the building had a message on it that read something like this:

"It's sad how it takes a disaster to bring the people of the world together."

I don't think that's verbatim, but it's something along those lines. Presumably, it's in reference to what's going on in Haiti. Well, if what that statement suggests were true, yes, you'd have to say that's sad. But it's not true. Earthquake in Haiti? Nope, that's not enough to bring the world together. What would be? Nuclear holocaust? Maybe. Short of that, though, nothing can bring this world together. Most of us are relatively isolated. That's not our fault, it's just how we're wired. We can only cram so many people into our monkeyspheres. I don't know anybody in Haiti. I'm sorry that there's suffering going on there, but I just don't have room for any sympathy beyond that. I don't apologize for that, nor do I feel that I should. It's the way that nearly all of us feel, even if most of us won't articulate it for fear of not being politically correct. Whatever. Nearly anybody who says that they really, truly care about the suffering of people they don't even know...they're lying to themselves. Even people who contribute to a cause like that, who make donations of money or food or clothing to victims of disasters and the like, even a frightening number of those people who make such a contribution aren't doing it out of the goodness of their heart. They're just doing it to promote their own public image. And then you've got folks like Rush Limbaugh and Pat Robertson who want to take advantage of a bad situation to further some bizarre pseudo-political position

Am I too jaded, too cynical? I have a hard time believing that I am. Seems to me that I'm the only one willing to recognize the world and the people who inhabit it as they are. I'm not saying that there isn't good in the world, and I'm not saying that there aren't good and sincere people. I am saying, however, that these people are relatively few and far between, and I am saying that too few people can be honest enough with themselves and others to admit that a tragedy like the earthquake in Haiti has no real effect on their lives. It can be sad in theory, but it's okay if it doesn't break your heart.

Enemies of the Mind

Day Two at Target. Much slower day this time around, slow enough that the last hour or so was spent largely being sent from one end of the store to another, looking for something else to do. At least I had company for most of that. At one point, there were about ten Flow people over in the health and beauty section (that is, cosmetics and such...ah, euphemisms for everything, how I hate that), which was about nine more people than really needed to be there. On top of that, I guess what we were putting out was stuff from back stock, but wherever it came from, it had no numbers to indicate where it ought to go on the shelves, and there are several rows of the stuff, so it was an awful lot like typing using the hunt and peck method while blindfolded. But hey, it sure beat unloading the truck, with someone on you constantly to go faster, go faster, and you know, there are limits to how fast a person can move, and at some point, you start moving so fast that you become one with the boxes.

I've been watching a lot of Food Network lately. Is that weird? I can't decide if that's weird for me or not. I mean, I do love food. But it's not like I can cook or anything. Well, I guess I probably could if I really tried...most things, I can just sort of wing it and it'll come out okay. You know what's awesome? Barbecue...oh, I loves me some BBQ. I know I'm not a super manly man or anything, but when it comes to food, I'm a meat and potatoes kind of guy. I'll eat some veg, I like pasta, but my favorite things are burgers and ribs. I'm all over that. I always thought steak was overrated, though. Too chewy for me. Same reason I stay away from the white meat in chicken and turkey. Too dry, too chewy. I like my meat juicy. Wow, that could possibly be taken the wrong way, eh?

For a final thought, Pat Robertson is the devil. Okay, that's ridiculous. I don't believe in the devil. Seriously though, the guy is terrible and ridiculous. I know he doesn't exactly have much credibility anymore, but you know there are still some fringy lunatics out there listening to and believing this guy's bilious words. Pat Robertson and people like him are largely responsible for the rampant anti-intellectualism in this country, which is why we're lagging so far behind Western Europe when it comes to...well, just about everything really. Makes a person wonder when the American populace are going to come to their senses and renounce religious dogma and fundamentalism and all those enemies of the mind. Really makes you wonder.

Observations on the Workplace

So, I have a new job. I unload the truck and stock the shelves (hopefully more of the latter than of the former in the future) at Target. After one day of this, I have concluded, at least temporarily, that this is okay. However, being me, I am considering this less a way to make an extra hundred or hundred and fifty bucks a week than as a way to observe people in a new setting which I previously didn't have access to. I mean, it's both of those things, really, but damn it, I like observing people!

Target, being a huge company, likes to run itself as much like a well-oiled machine as possible. Things are pretty precisely timed, that much was apparent immediately. You have exactly this long, down to the minute, to finish unloading the truck. You have exactly this long to finish stocking the shelves. They know exactly how many people they will need to make sure these things will be done exactly at this time. I checked the clock; we finished unloading the truck at exactly 7:30. I checked again; we were done stocking at 10 on the nose. Well-oiled machine. Okay, that's not unexpected. What was more interesting to me was the sorts of people working within this well-oiled machine. I am part of what the company calls the Flow Team, whatever that means. There are probably a couple dozen of us, roughly two-thirds male, roughly two-thirds in my general age bracket. Most of about my age are probably students or are working at Target as a second job (or perhaps both). Without knowing for sure, I'd guess that I'm probably the most educated person on the team. No judgment there, just an observation. It's a pretty eclectic mix of people, anyway. One of them is Rick's brother, of all things, and he looks pretty well like Willie Nelson and acts about as you might expect of someone with such an appearance.

The point is, it's not the sort of people you would expect to be part of a calculating machine. I guess that's the nature of people in such a position. Your lower-tiered workers aren't really interested in the company running smoothly and efficiently; they're just in it for the paycheck, and they might as well have as good a time as possible while working. It's the same sort of thing I saw while working at Hollywood Video, though nobody would every accuse that company of being a well-oiled machine.

Eh, this is what I do. Well, that and get up way too early in the morning to go to work. So this is what it's like to have a job...

It's All in the Title

So, I just read two other blogs, and both of the writers made mention of their astrological signs and at least half-seriously used them to explain some aspect of their behavior. That's not a criticism or anything, I do that myself all the time (I'm a Libra, I strive for balance in my life, etc.) Just interesting. Also, why do some people always have to be doing something? Is there something so wrong with a degree of tranquility in your life? I dunno, maybe it's just me, but it seems like everything these days just has to happen so fast, and we just have to be doing something constantly, or else we're not being productive. My thinking is, you can do something without really doing something, you know? Some people would say that writing in this blog isn't really all that productive, and that I should be doing something worthwhile. Just because you're out of the house doesn't mean you're doing something productive. You're probably just dicking around somewhere, trying to make your body or your brain or both feel like it's doing something when it actually isn't. Maybe I'm just deluded or I feel like I'm having more of an impact on the world than I really am...well, not really. I wish I was having more of an impact on the world with these entries, because the world would be so much better off if it would listen to me. Well, it would at least be a world free of Nickelback and Sarah Palin...so, I write, and hope that someone will listen eventually, so that even if this is not immediately productive, it could be someday! I'm just kind of rambling now. Let's focus...

http://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/news/world/swine-flu-a-false-pandemic-to-sell-vaccines-expert-says/story-e6frev00-1225818409903

Saw that this morning. The gist of it is in the title. I read that, and I'm thinking...holy hell, I was saying that six months ago! The press is just now getting this idea? I mean, I know six months ago it seemed a bit like a conspiracy theory, but come on! Was anybody seriously worried about this swine flu? It's actually quite a bit less severe than your typical flu, and certainly less deadly. But, you know, people just have to get all worked up about nothing. It's what we do best. And then the media plays it up, because we have the worst news coverage ever. Instead of actually attempting to detail the facts, they go right for the sensationalist aspects. And because the media blows it out of proportion, it becomes a pandemic. And because everything in this country has to make money somehow, we exploit the panic to sell some vaccines. Ah, good ol' capitalism. By the way, yes, I see that the article is from Australia. It applies here just the same, if not more.

Now that's productivity!

Brief Conflicts of the Mind

You know when you're eating chips out of a bag, and you're getting kind of towards the bottom, and you've really had your fill, but there are still maybe two or three handfuls of chips left in the bag, and you don't really want to eat the rest because you've had enough, but it seems ridiculous to bother putting such a small amount of chips back in the cabinet, but you don't really want to throw them away because that's wasteful? Don't you pretty much always end up just eating the rest anyway? I know I do. But it always ends up ruining that kind of chips for me for awhile. I just finished a bag of Doritos like that, and now I probably won't be wanting any more of those for at least a few months. It was just too much, and it kind of left a bad taste in my mouth...so to speak. Yet it somehow seemed like the better option at the time. Is this one of those little human moments that we all share but never talk about? I hope it is, I love those!

Here's a thought...Hank Azaria is ridiculously talented. Now, if you're a normal person, you probably don't even know who he is, and that's a shame. He's been in a handful of movies and TV shows. If you know him from anything, it's probably from The Simpsons, where he does about 843 voices, most notably Moe and Apu. The sheer volume and diversity of the voices he does is incredible and very much worthy of my envy. I've only got about six voices, and five and a half of them suck. So hey, it's not easy. So write Hank Azaria a note to let him know that you appreciate his talent, because I don't think he gets enough of that sort of thing.

And another thing...there is nothing that Canada could ever do to make up for inflicting Nickelback upon the world. I know, they also gave us Alanis Morissette and Sarah McLachlan and Rush (the band, not the Limbaugh), but that doesn't make it okay! Nickelback is just...well, they're just terrible. Like, you know when you say something is the bees' knees? No? How about the crows' elbows? The dolphins' shins? Whatever. It's like that, only the opposite.

On a final note, I was thinking, are there any words that you really like but never seem to get the opportunity to use in day-to-day conversation? Like, oh, I dunno...paramecium. It just doesn't come up much, you know? But it's a neat sort of word. There are others, that's just the one that sprung to mind. So...a wonderful, paramecium-filled day to you all!

That Ain't Right

My summation of the contents of my blog (as described to Liz):

I've been skipping joyfully between political and moral outrage, daily events, free-floating hatred, random admonishments, stories with no beginning and no end, and series of rhetorical questions.

I think that covers the better part of it. Anyone have anything they would like to add to that?

I like a little bit of diversity here. I get bored doing the same sorts of things over and over. If anyone reading this remembers me in high school, you might recall my time as an editorialist for the school paper, when I wrote articles about the following, in this order: the bad parts of Christianity, sporks, legalization of drugs, Pete Rose, and the downside of modern medicine. So yes, I do like a little variety.

Today, I've got some thoughts on the controversy brewing in Washington, D.C., pertaining to the new laws permitting gay marriage. My general thoughts on gay marriage are positive. I mean, hell, your heart hasn't got any idea about the sex of the person (people?) you love. Besides that, two gay men is twice as hilarious as one gay man! And two gay women...well, that's just hot! Haha, I kid, I kid! Seriously, though, screw the government for allowing conservative bigots to hold a gun to their head on this issue. Gay people are still people, after all, no reason they shouldn't have the same rights as everyone else. And if some people don't like it, then they can not have anything to do with it, but they should not be allowed to force their beliefs onto people who want nothing to do with them. You know what they call that in the civilized world? They call that a dictatorship! Anyway, D.C. passed a law permitting gay marriage, and the Catholic Church is freaking out, of course. The archdiocese is threatening to pull out their social programs because the law essentially would force the Church to adhere to the law and not exclude gay couples from their programs. But, oh no, that would require the church to recognize gay marriages!

Frankly, these people need to get their heads out of their collective asses and realize that the world is changing. You wonder why you're seeing more and more empty seats in the pews every week? It's because you are out of touch with the real world in this day and age! These days, there are probably more men scraping their knees in the bedroom than in your confessionals. People are having a harder and harder time relating to outdated religions. The unfortunate side effect of this, of course, is that the people who stick with the religion are becoming increasingly fanatical about it, and we're getting more and more zealots, which means more screaming lunatics trying to influence the politicians, which means more anti-gay laws and all that nasty sort of legislation that infringes all over people's rights. And when you get right down to it, that's the one I feel most strongly about. Rights are rights, and nobody deserves to have them taken away based on nothing more than the way they are wired. That ain't right.

One Of Those Days

Sometimes, you just gotta jump up and down on your bed in your underwear while rocking out to some George Michael tunes.

This is not one of those times.

Sometimes, you just gotta stack some tupperware, I mean really stack that shit, like, you gotta go get a folding chair from the other room and stand on it in order to stack some more tupperware.

This is not one of those times.

Sometimes, you just gotta recite some random numbers while snorting a line of cocaine off the foot of a Belgian prostitute.

This is not one of those times.

Sometimes, you just gotta swoop in and save the day at the last minute, like a Peruvian.

This is not one of those times.

Sometimes, things shake out in just such a way that when you stub your toe and trip and start to fall, your nostril catches on a protruding nail and...well, the rest of that story is not so pretty.

This, however, is not one of those times.

Sometimes, you just gotta drink some milk.

This, ladies and gentlemen, is one of those times.

And now it's not. That was some refreshing milk, though.

Oh, and one other thing.

Do you ever feel like your life is some sort of bizarre film noir? Like, you do something completely uneventful like going to the deli, and before you know it, someone is narrating your every action, only you can't see them, or maybe you can, and then the world goes all black and white, or maybe sepia, and guy at the deli counter has a perplexing moustache and says something that sounds like it could have been in a Bob Dylan song? And then...oh...um...hang on, I kinda lost my train of thought there...seemed like I had something to say about Italy...hrm...oh well, I guess it couldn't have been that important.

Wait! I've got it! And then you ask for some thinly sliced turkey breast! And the guy at the deli counter says, "Sure thing!" and then you get your thinly sliced turkey breast, and suddenly things are all normal again!

I had one of those days.

The Meeting (part the first)

I’m in a hotel room somewhere, New Mexico, I think. There is a lamp on over there on the nightstand, but the curtains are drawn, and the lighting is dim. The room smells vaguely of over-ripe bananas, but I am due to escape this luxury, I know. The phone rings. I answer it. The voice on the other end of the line can only be described as creaky, but it knows exactly what it has to say, and the tone indicates that it should not be questioned.
“Go to the office. Pay your bill, tell them you’ll be checking out. Ask for directions to the diner in town. Be there in a half hour. There is a car for you in the parking lot. The keys are under the seat.”
The line goes dead. I put the phone back on its cradle. Looking around the room, I spot a pair of jeans and a faded black t-shirt which appear to have been tossed onto the chair in the corner. I put these on; they fit well. There is something in the back pocket of the jeans, a wallet. I take it out and open it. It is empty except for a sheaf of bills. I count them quickly. Almost a hundred dollars American. My gaze returns to the nightstand in search of a clock. The alarm clock flashes 12:00. I decide that it doesn’t matter, since I don’t know how far it is to town anyway. With nothing apparent to pack up, I open the door and walk out into what looks to be about midday sunshine, with a burst of dry heat accompanying it. I squint up into the cloudless sky for a moment, then look down at the row of doors that make up the front of the hotel. The last one looks to be the office, and I move towards it. A bell clangs against the door as I open it. Behind the desk, a large, rotund man with a strange sort of male-pattern baldness reads a magazine and ignores my entrance until I speak to him.
“I’m, uh, ready to check out,” I say, and my voice sounds foreign to me, as though it’s been too long since I last used it.
“What room?” the man says without looking up.
“Uh, six,” I say, clearing my throat.
Finally, the man puts his magazine down and punches a few keys on the ancient computer on his desk.
“Forty-two fifty-nine,” he says gruffly. I fish a couple of twenties and a five out of my wallet and hand it across the counter to him. He grunts and gives me my change, which I accept.
I scan the walls quickly in search of a clock and locate one. It is a few minutes after noon. I turn back to the man at the desk, who has picked up his magazine again.
“I hear the diner in town is a pretty good place to grab a bite,” I offer, hoping to prompt a response. The man grunts. I try again.
“Is it very far into town from here?” This gets yet another grunt, but finally some more words.
“About ten minutes that way,” he says, pointing down the road that runs in front of the hotel. “It’s a straight shot, you’ll find it.”
“Okay, thanks,” I say, and start to go back outside when one more thing occurs to me. There are two vehicles parked out front, a candy-apple-red sports car that is positively gleaming, and an El Camino of indeterminate color that looks like it ought to be up on cinder blocks in somebody’s front yard. Once more, reluctantly, I turn back to the man at the desk.
“Is, uh, that yours?” I ask, pointing at the sports car.
Two minutes later, I’m digging under the seat in the El Camino, trying to locate the keys. Finally, I find them amidst a scattering of papers and other miscellaneous trash, and moments later, the car roars to life and improbably pulls out of the parking lot and onto the road.